Random, Just Read It! / Social Experiments

Air Jordan: The Man, The Myth, The Pimp

In case you may not know me, I consider myself to be an “Undercover Sneakerhead” meaning I’m into the retro sneaker game, but it’s not all I work for in life.  Like I’m a fan of pretty much any retro Jordan 1-15 and the other classics like the AirMax, Olympic Pippen’s, AI’s the Questions, etc.  As I waited patiently for UPS to deliver my latest pair of J’s, the Retro “Military” IV’s I began to think about how I’ve always worn J’s or had at least 2 pair in my closet most of the time.  I was talking to a fellow sneakerhead and I came to the conclusion that I can’t afford to buy a pair of J’s every damn paycheck, but dude is still releasing a pair like every 2 weeks all year!  From there we went into how Jordan has been pimpin’ us pretty much all our lives…which made perfect sense to me.  As a lil kid I wanted the new J’s, back then they were a lot easier to come by, and now as an adult I drool over the same damn shoes.

Peep the Pimp Suit

Then we both decided it’s all we know…basically Micheal Jordan is a PIMP!  Michael Jordan bares a lot of responsibility for these obscene snapshots of imbecility and retarded priorities. Urban children have been killing one another over Jordan attire and memorabilia since the 1980s. Yet, he has not uttered a single syllable to condemn the behavior or offer condolences. He most certainly has never lobbied to make his shoe prices more in line with the demographic that inordinately patronize his products. He just shoves his bloodied hands in his tailored suits, where those collected bundles of Benjamins are, and keeps it pushing towards his next exploitative deal and opportunistic endeavor. Expecting him to voice a word of reason or articulate anything that resembles reason and caring, is like expecting to see water flowing uphill or see a thunderstorm indoors.

Does that not sound like a pimp to you?

Jordan is projected to make a profit of $1 billion, by some media estimates. But not only has Jordan surgically removed himself culturally from any and all things black — he blatantly disrespected a nation of black men who assembled in a show of responsibility during the Million Man March in 1995 — he has never been made to answer for the slave sweat shops that manufacture his Nike shoes. Understand this, people; there is a great reason why the coveted shoes are not made in this country. Here, it is unlawful to work so hard for so little so that someone can live a Bentley lifestyle.

Does that not sound like a pimp to you?

People forget that he was a “great” friend to O.J. Simpson until ‘The Juice’ got hemmed up in the trial of the century for killing his wife and jump-off lover, and Jordan predictably went scampering to hide in the nearest crack in the wall with roach-like efficiency. Something similar went down after he and Charles Barkley helped “mentor” Tiger Woods into wholesale whoredom and then he, again, got ghost when the lights shined brightly on the Tiger compound on that fateful Thanksgiving evening. In addition to his apathy and callousness towards others in lower tax brackets, Jordan is a friend of convenience, a fairweather friend as Johnny Gill crooned about in the 90s.

Doesn’t that kinda sorta sound very pimp-ish?

I’m not saying that I’m *not* going to cop the Olympics that supposedly come out next month, but what I am saying is that I know a pimp when I see one.  I actually feel sorry for the ones that haven’t realized that we all getting pimp’d by the best.  People often assume because you get rich that you have to “give back” well folks, nobody can tell you what to do with your money.

Have you ever owned a pair of Jordans or Jordan apparel?  Do you feel Jordan is pimp? Would you buy Jordans even knowing he doesn’t give back to the community?  What’s the craziest thing you’ve heard of regarding Jordans?  



Thanks for tuning in…..



11 thoughts on “Air Jordan: The Man, The Myth, The Pimp

  1. As a fellow, “closet sneakerhead” I couldn’t agree more. We’re all being pimped by Jordan to buy his shoes. As a kid, I always wanted every pair but my parents couldn’t afford them. Now that I’m an adult making my own money, I sort of pick and choose my favorite pairs and shell out a few bills. Is it a smart investment? Nope, not at all. But I enjoy the nostalgia of owning a pair of Js that I grew up drooling over.

    I know Jordan is a pimp and and one of the biggest assholes on this planet. With that said, I’m still going to try to buy the Breds when they drop this Christmas, lol.

  2. I’ve never owned a pair of J’s because of how much they cost (Then again my parents never copped that Generation 1 Optimus Prime for me either.) and the only pair that I actually thought were dope was the one’s that had the black patent leather. I was amazed by Mike Jordan’s skills and openly rooted against him for most of his career.

    Mike is an unapologetic capitalist which is similar to a pimp but not quite the same thing. The riots last year just seemed odd to me but folks want what they want.

  3. *Slow Motion Camp* Clif and I did a segment similar to this on our sports talk news segment a couple of months ago. I’ve never purchased a pair of J’s, but I do own a couple of pair that I took as “hand me downs” (I don’t turn that much if I can fit it and it’s in good condition…I’ve got two kids…#Daycare). He’s selfish and all about him. I believe what started as a defense mechanism for him, in terms of the massive chip on his shoulder propelling him to various heights of success, became his truth and mantra for life. All Jordan, all the time….SMH. Good post Brownlee

  4. Great post. Problem is, the exact same beef with MJ could be replicated across many spectrums of the market. Prescription pain pill producers? Pimping out addicts. Polluting ass factories? Pimping out carcinogens. Tobacco companies? Alcohol companies?

    • Being that we live in a country that lets pharmaceutical companies market directly to the consumer amazes me…so I agree we all get pimp’d to some degree.

  5. I havent ever had a pair of Js, but I can’t say I never wanted any. I really really really wanted the pair that came out in 8th grade (I know a million probably came out in those years [98-99], but I’m sure if I did a google search, I could find the ones I’m talking about…lol), and my parents were all “hell naw!” So I settled for some air max. I’ve always heard stories about the great MJ being an ass, but damn. I kind of think it’s funny that pretty much everyone I know and love has fallen victim to his pimp hand (it’s way strong obviously), and they *know* better. Makes me feel like can’t nobody judge me for drooling over Louis & Louboutins. We all in the same boat. We want what we want, and dont care about getting pimped if it makes us feel or look good. C’est La Vie. 🙂

    • I think you mean the XIV’s…those are cool, but I don’t own a pair…I do own a pair of Jordan socks that were made to go with those shoes however.

  6. Pingback: The Myth of Rags to Riches « From Ashy to Classy

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