Lust and Love / Real Talk, No Kevin Hart

Ego Trippin’

A couple of weeks ago one of my good friends met a nice young lady at a party. She was cute…real cute. Nice body, perky tits, pretty face, racially ambiguous with blue eyes.  I’ll give the male readers a minute to let the mental picture develop. Not to say that racially ambiguous people are better than any purebreds out there, but as Pusha T so eloquently put it, “The mixed ones hold shape and recycle better.”  As I was saying: basically, she was all that without Nick Cannon.

Have any of you ever met somebody, and then 5 minutes after you meet that person you start to daydream about what the next five years of a full blown relationship might be like with him or her? Stop lying; I know I’m not the only one. This girl was the type to have that effect on a guy. Everything about her was seemingly A-Otay, except for one pretty glaring problem. She’s only 20, which meant that my friend’s options of pursuit were limited. Now as someone who digs on older women, I’m an advocate for the whole age-aint-nothing-but-a-number clan; no relation to R. Kelly and his leather throwback jerseys. But for a girl that young, it’s a whole different ballgame. She’s not exactly the type where one could hit and/or quit. Don’t get me wrong; that sounds like a good option in theory, but sometimes the quitting part doesn’t quite happen. N words catch feelings too. Because beautiful, down to Earth women can have that effect on a dudes’ emotions. And what kind of friend would I be to let my boy get himself into something that I know is not in his best interest?  He could have kept her around and molded her into the woman that she had the full potential to be with time and proper coaching, but he has a short attention span so that probably wouldn’t work either. Door #3, however, the option to date this girl, (and potentially fall for her) wasn’t really an option. As it turns out, through no actual research at all, girls that young have not likely been through an important phase of their lives. The phase, if memory serves me correct, was coined by the great Caesar as “The Hoe Stage”  “The Period of Promiscuity.”

The Period of Promiscuity is a stage in a young woman’s life where she may get a little uninhibited, even reckless about some, most, or pretty much all of her sexual encounters, typically somewhere between the ages of 18-25. It could last for a few weeks, a few months, or like some chicks I know, it could be a never-ending story minus the flying, white dog. The point is that it is likely going to happen or has already happened to many women you know and love. Your significant other, your little sister, your favorite cousin, your aunts, your nieces, and yes…even your mother probably went through the same thing (that probably goes double for 90’s babies). I know it stings to have to know that about the most important women in our lives, but the truth must be told. Let that bitch breathe.

Despite where you thought this was going, it’s likely not. I’m not here to harp on the behavior of young women. If a hoe wanna be a hoe, let a hoe fly. Fuck it, YOLO right? What I’m attempting to do is issue a reality check for the male ego; it’s a motherfucker. I’ve seen lifelong friendships erode over a tootsie roll pop because of the male ego. Being the great mind that I like to think I am, I figured if men and our egos will come to accept the unproven theory of the Period of Promiscuity, our insecurities will be diminished in some matters of dealing with the opposite sex. See, I know a lot of guys who will look past a woman because of her past (smart choices in some cases). Men who won’t give a woman a chance because he heard that maybe she slept with a friend of an acquaintance 3 years ago. I won’t lie; I was one of those guys when I was younger. I embrace the double standard. Why wouldn’t I?  It’s one of the great joys of being a man. Besides, nobody wants to be the dude that gave THAT girl a wedding ring. But, for some reason, all men want this fictional character known as a good girl who goes into full Adina Howard mode in the sack. As I get older and wiser; however, I’ve realized that this woman ceases to have ever existed, and the quicker men realize this, the more secure and happier we can all be in our relationships with our significant other. In no way, shape, or form am I advocating that one make a housewife of a whore. Smarten up, Nas. What I am saying is that thing that your girl does so well that causes your legs to give out…you probably didn’t teach her how to do that. Everybody has a past. And it’s quite okay to fall in like with that chick for who she is, but what’s more important is that you don’t punish her for who she was.

Unless it was like six months ago. There’s gotta be some kind of statute of limitations to this shit.


How much experience is too much experience?  If your significant other performs like and adult star, do you question where they learned that from?  Does really matter where or how they learned it if it makes ya toes curl?!



5 thoughts on “Ego Trippin’

  1. I get what you’re saying but sometimes that hoe period is too much and the only thng left for me to do is add to it. S/o to the cat that took the time to teach her that lil trick with her tongue and smh at the dude that puts a ring on it because of it.

    My ego can handle a chick with a oast, but my pride can’t take that past rearing iys head at the wrong time, like ever.

  2. Pingback: Men and the Madonna “HO” Complex « From Ashy to Classy

  3. Pingback: 5 Things that Scare the Hell Out of EVERY MAN…ever. « The Writerz Block

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