Lust and Love / Social Experiments

I Be Strokin’


A friend had a Facebook status the other day about girls calling their significant other “Daddy”.

That’s gross.

I’ve never put much thought into why a girl would want to call the guy she’s sleeping with and the guy who helped create her the same thing but it was a slow day at work and I had some time to ponder, and keep up with the comments.

One idea was that it was some sort of compensation for the guy not taking responsibility of his own kids.  Transference.  I get that.  Still doesn’t do anything to take away from the creepy factor.  And why you are with a guy that isn’t taking care of his children well…

And another idea was that the women do it because they are missing a father figure in their lives.  Their man has taken the place of a lover and a father all rolled into one big ball of confusion that maybe only deep psychoanalysis can fix.  The things Greek tragedies are made of.

But the main consensus was that it was an ego booster for the guys.  A version of “no you don’t look fat in that” or “of course I wasn’t checking out that hot chick”,  but for men.  And I can understand that to a point.  Everyone needs a little ego stroking from time to time.  But with as many folks out there with “daddy issues” (read: crazy) why is that a task someone would willingly take on?  Even if a girl adores her biological father, calling her man daddy just seems like a lot of expectations being put on his shoulder.  And if that’s the case how could you ever compete?

And out of all the ways in the world to have your ego stroked, how is being called Daddy one of them?  Sure you can take your girl shopping and make sure she’s taken care of, but when she talks back are you going to ground her?  If she doesn’t wash the dishes are you going to take back her Louis (or Coach, or Nine West, or Knockoff, or Target, or Wal-Mart, the “daddy” thing covers lots of tax brackets) bag?  If she breaks curfew are you going to whoop her?

You see my problem?  Someone please explain the appeal to me!  Am I just not that into ego stroking and coddling?  Have I been doing it wrong all these years?

Ladies, have you ever called your man Daddy?  Lil Daddy? Big Poppa?  Guys, have you ever requested this from your lady friends?  Papi?  Mr. Big?  Daddy FatStacks?  Any other ways you care to have your ego stroked?  Talk to me. 

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3 thoughts on “I Be Strokin’

  1. I called a guy a used to like lil daddy occasionally. It was a joke and it would make him smile and so I’d throw it out there. He never wanted me to call him that as a real term of endearment though. However, I’ve never called a man Daddy. That’s a visual image I don’t want to evoke when I’m talking to someone I might be having sex
    with.

    As far as my ego I’m thinking for myself I’m a typical girl in that a, “hey beautiful” goes a long way! For a guy I’m dating, I’m partial to a classic genuine thank you for taking out the trash or passing a jar I can’t open his way etc…

  2. Welp…here’s my 2 cents.

    I’ve had 2 relationships where I called a man “Daddy” besides the Rev. Babineaux (my ace Daddy). First, my ex-H and I used to call each other “Mama/Daddy” to get the kiddos to know who to call what. Then it just kind of turned into what we always called each other all the time. Never in the bedroom though. Its funny to think back on now because we were so wrapped up in being parents we forgot our real names lol. Then…there was a guy I dated whom I called Daddy…in the bedroom. I have no idea when or how it started but it did. It was a bit of an ego stroke and…well I don’t really know. I gues you could say I have Daddy issues (he was always there, parents are still together but as I grew up I fell from grace as Daddy’s Little Girl, nother story nother time) but I have never connected the two in my mind. My personal opinion is that people are just different in bed as to what turns them on, feels comfortable or “gets them there”. Just like some men prefer a, erm…untouched look on a woman (you know what I mean) doesn’t mean they have an affinity to little girls. It is what it is. Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar…

    • Ahh I see. Well this is a to each his own situation just like all things in the bedroom. I’ll just say it aint for me, not exactly that it’s gross.

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