Featured Fridays

Do It In the Kitchen, Its better that way

Todays’s Featured Friday writer is Gabrielle Ayars.  She is a triple threat; she is God-Fearing, intelligent, and speaks 3 languages fluently.  A graduate of Southern University, where she eventually landed a golf scholarship, Gabby is also a member of DST.  Did I mention that Gabby is an aspiring singer/songwriter with a voice that will bring you to your feet!! Without further ado, lets Do It In the Kitchen with Gabby! 

So can your relationship survive this age of quick fixes? It can be difficult filtering through the giddy emotions of being “in love” versus the logical concrete definitive proof (slight exaggeration) that you may have a possible match.  If you know anything about being in a relationship, you would know that they function at maximum productivity when each party is cognizant of their obligations. In laymens terms you must KNOW YOUR ROLE!  Although our society has made it its personal mission to redefine what it means to be a man or a woman, I believe as one wise person once said “If it aint broke, don’t fix it.” If it worked for our grandparents, then surely it can work for us. Simply put, principles don’t change, methods do.

Ladies, you must first understand that there is power in submission. Our society will have you to believe that submitting makes you weak and powerless, but it’s actually quite the opposite. Submission is a mechanism that all of creation naturally functions under except humans, and it’s our way of getting things done. Submission works like a motivator for men. When a man sees that his woman trust him, it motivates him to do for her in return. Even further it allows him to be more careful about decisions that will affect them both. Besides we cannot be picky when it comes to when and where we want to submit.  We do it every time we go on a date and our honey says “No baby, I got the check” How many of us actually dare to argue against his decision to pay?


Try cooking your favorite recipe that he is not familiar with together. Why? I’m glad you asked. Historically the kitchen has been the woman’s domain just as much as the car garage has been the man’s domain. For that reason it’s the area that you are (theoretically) skillfully dominant in, and he is not. As stated before, knowing your role as a woman is key to your relationship’s survival. As the man of the house, you beau will act as commander and chief of the household. However a good leader knows his weaknesses just as well has his strengths. This simple test will allow you to see if he is able to step down from the leadership role and take direction from a more experienced cook. From my experience, no man likes taking orders, especially from a woman.  This exercise will help you to see if he is able to work with you rather than against you. The kitchen puts your man in a more humble, submissive position where he must depend on his help mate to get fed. This submissive role will also allow him to relate to you better in the future.  It’s okay if you’re no Betty Crocker.  Remember, the goal is to create a wonderful meal together, argument and drama free. Please note that this is not your opportunity to play dictator and shout out orders, but both you and your loved one should practice ways to communicate that build each other up and not tear one another down.

So turn the heat up, and get to grinding…on your meal!

Follow Gabby on her blog –  www.ladylikemoi.net


2 thoughts on “Do It In the Kitchen, Its better that way

  1. As soon as I saw the title, I thought about R. Kelly’s song Sex in the Kitchen “by the buttered rolls”, but as I read this actually sounds like a good idea in theory. I’ve found it fun to get a cook book, both pick a meal, then both make it as a team. Gives you both a chance to try a new dish while trying something new.

  2. yesterday i wrote a post that dealt with gentle domination and submission within the relationship structure… you’ve got great points… love what your guest has had to say…. big love to her for her words, and of course big love to you for allowing her to dish the truth as you ladies see it… men like me put an edge on our view…then again, i write for my nearly 100% all woman subscription….lol


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