Welcome to the 3rd installment of Stuff Black People Like. Enjoy.
“Yes We Can!!” was a black victory cry during the 2008 Presidential Race that resulted in our nation’s first black President. (…well half black, but in our country 1/16th means your black…) During his campaign you couldn’t go 10 feet without seeing a black person wearing a t-shirt, a hat, headband, du-rag, weave, haircut, or anything else we could slap a picture of Barack to show our support. After the announcement was made that Barack was the President-elect, black people far and wide celebrated with tears of joy and bottles of Hennessy.
Personally, I think it’s cool to support your President. Especially because he is a part of a monumental election in US History. But there were a lot of black individuals voting for him on the sheer fact that he was black. I’m all for supporting your fellow black man, but there were a lot of uneducated voters out there. Barack has some great policies that people should be knowledgeable about. Perhaps this re-election year, we should make it a point to educate ourselves instead of just d*** riding.
The Hook Up
Person 1: “Say Bro, you work at Sprint right?”
Person 2: “Yeah, why? What’s up?
Person 1: “Well uh, my phone broke and I’m not up for an upgrade. You think you can hook ya boy up?”
The above conversation happens on a
daily hourly basis in the black community. Just replace the phone with a shirt, pants, shoes, mp3 player, cheeseburger, weave, staplers, sticky notes, bag of chips, Newports, drank, air freshners, clocks, thumbtacks, brushes, floss, DVDs, computers, pens, penc…well you get the picture. Just about any product or service fits the bill.
The more hook ups one acquires or provides, the higher that person’s status in the community. So we all strive to reach higher levels by obtaining more products and services…for the low. Hell, Master P even made a movie based on this concept. Wasn’t the best film, but I’d be lying to you if I said I didn’t watch it…twice.
Here’s another sample conversation just for the hell of it:
Person: *skips line at the club* “You remember me?!”
Club Bouncer: “Naw Bro.”
Person: “Aww that’s messed up, I used to run with your little Brother back in the day. Like back in 2nd grade!”
Club Bouncer: “Umm, okay.”
Person: “Yeah man, so uh, since we go way back…*whispers* what’s up with lettin’ ya boy get in for free?”
You can’t go to a black cookout or gathering without hearing the sound of dishes being washed. By dishes, I mean dominoes. The game itself is very simple to learn. It can be played with two, three, or four individuals. The object is to play one domino per turn to connect corresponding numbers to make multiples of five. For each multiple of five, you score points. Games usually go to 150 points or “three houses.”
Playing bones with family or your friends always brings out the inner s**t talker. Slamming ‘em down and yelling “Domino M*******a!!!” when you “go out” is one of the more popular lines to scream thanks to Dough Boy from “Menace 2 Society.” You can also hear phrases like: “Cupcakes and twankies!”/”Nick ‘em don’t cut ‘em/”Tension need I mention?!”/”What that Chinese man say?? SANG TANG!” And a slew of others.
Did I miss anything within the past three segments? Let me know in the comments below.
As always folks, stay classy.
In case you missed the previous two, here are the links: