Today’s post is from a reader that really had to get somethings off their chest. So here it is, I ”give it to them just how it come to me, Real and unedited, not like it be on T.V” – (anyone that can tell me where that quote came from is Suave)
If you have any familiarity with the story of Pandora and her box, you know that when she opened it, out of it flowed every form of evil, but what remained was hope. I believe this is reminiscent of my state of being from time to time, ESPECIALLY when it comes to romantic relationships, except for the evil part, I would consider it all chaos rather than out right evil. With that being said, the flow of this blog will be chaotic, but will HOPEFULLY pull together at the end.
First things first, when did it become okay to ask a woman out on a date via facebook (or any social media forum) or text messages? So a man no longer has enough character to pick up the phone or ask a woman face to face for her time? And WHEN did it become okay for a husband to text his wife admitting to his infidelity (I wish this was only a scenario, and not a real life situation)? What on earth makes a man think this is acceptable? What is the root of such cowardice & cold-hearted behavior?
Why is it that morality rests on the shoulders of women? Men are praised for promiscuity and women are practically condemned. Why is there a difference? What’s the root of it all?
Ladies, why are we lowering our standards and accepting anything men throw at us as if we’re stray dogs (I have fell prey to this shenanigans too SMDH)? “I ain’t got no job, but I got ambition…” AMBITION ain’t paying bills, and it show ain’t about to pay for this meal!!! BROKE FOLKS SHOULD NOT DATE!! “ I ain’t sayin’ I’m a gold digga, but…” you finish the rest (sidenote- I am not a fan of Kanye, but I agree with him on this one). I digress…
Ladies, believe it or not, there are good men on Earth. I’ve happen to come across a few in passing. I’ve learned by default that you cannot convince or coerce a man into believing that you are the best thing since sliced bread or shea butter (I love that stuff, it does wonders for the skin). Manipulating a man with your beauty and/or sex is short lived. I mean let’s keep it real! We convince ourselves that if I look irresistible and if the sex is mind-blowing, we’ll be able to hook’em, and he will stick around. Yeah he might come around, but it sure as hell ain’t because you have intelligent conversation… Ask yourself this question, is he spending more time talking to me face to face, or more time talking to me while he’s hittin’ it from behind? I’m just saying. Let’s get some substance and love who we are with everything that we are. That’s the stuff that fosters substantial and lasting relationships. If you’re a mess, most likely you will attract A MESS…it ain’t rocket science.
I read a blog the other day that men and women have a different love language, and I whole heartedly agree. There are differences in how we each give and receive love, but there are some commonalities amongst women vs men. As a woman, and most other women, there is a need and desire to connect on many layers. I need to feel safe and protected, I need intimacy (and there’s a significant difference between intimacy and sex, but that’s another conversation), I need to feel cherished and respected, and I need to NEVER (that ain’t good English, but you get my point) question where I stand with a man who is courting me. There’s more, but for time sake, I’ll move on. I’m a firm believer that when a man truly wants and desires a woman past sex you will know it without question, but then again, this theory is fallible. So how do men love? Where is the disconnect taking place between men and women that has caused us to consider love a “game”? In my eyes, we’ve deduced love to facades, walls, and an out right war to protect our hearts. Love is the ultimate state of vulnerability, so it stands to reason that if we are in proverbial “game”, then what we are displaying is an illusion of love.
I would love to hear your thoughts on these issues and possible answers to my questions. I would ABSOLUTELY love Ceasar’s insight on the male perspective…